A still small voice

:: in my weakness is His strength::

2012-03-04T02:50:00.005-08:00

"The Washing Of The Feet" by Fr. Seiger Koder

I love this painting, I have two copies, one at work on my filing cabinet which is right next to my desk and one at home in my study. I love it because it reminds me that serving God brings me the greatest of joys and fills my heart to bursting point. It reminds me of my daily prayer asking to serve others through Gods great strength and goodness. To serve Him with a humble and full heart.

I have recently been in hospital for an operation. Not a very pleasant one but necessary for me to have a more comfortable life. I was very anxious about this and very much afraid as we often are. However, despite my fear I trusted that whatever the outcome, God would not fail me and he would not forsake me. As I prepared for the operation through prayer God gave me this scripture:

“My grace is all you need. My power works best in your weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

2 Corinthians 12 V 9- 10

As I read this scripture I decided that my prayer would be that whilst in hospital God would allow me to serve others to His glory, that was it - simple but from the heart, I knew God would handle the success of the operation for me - I had bigger fish to fry.

On the day of the operation we walked into the hospital at 7.30am, I was first on the list and before I knew it I was walking down to the operating theatre with my husband, the next thing I knew I was lying on a trolley in recover four hours later smiling - just smiling , basking in Gods goodness and love. I think the staff thought I was high on morphine.He hadn't forsaken me, he hadn't left me.

But My prayer had been to serve, which at the time seemed impossible from a hospital bed with tubes and drips and an epidural which meant I couldn't move from the waist down. But our God is bigger than than, and so from that bed, unable to move, I was able to pray for the other ladies in the ward and the patients in the hospital. I was able to give thanks to God for His blessing and in the night I could read scripture to the lady next to me who was in terrible pain and wanted to hear the psalms. I could listen to the nurse who had heartache with her boyfriend and I could encourage the girl opposite who was in terrible pain and far from home and loved ones. Because the heart can still love even when the legs cant work and through this love God can speak to us and he can show us how to serve Him.

When the epidural and the wires and tubes came out I could sit next to the lady next to me and hold her hand and pray for her. When I could shuffle round the ward I could bring her cold compresses, I could hold hand, rub backs and I could love.

But the most remarkable part of this experience was the relationship I built with a girl and her mother in the opposite bed. She had been in hospital for a month in terrible pain and the specialists couldn't find out what was wrong they had tried everything. We became pals and she was fascinated by my prayer shawl which had been made for me by my church. She loved the idea of their prayers being wrapped around me bringing me comfort. She and her mother spent a lot of time talking to me and my family and they asked if I would pray for her, of course I had been already. That night they tried a new pain relief. While she rocked in pain and cried I placed my holding cross in her hand and gently wrapped the prayer shawl around her shoulders. She slept for 12 hours, for the first time in a month she didn't wake up in pain through the night. Praise God.

When she woke I told her the prayer shawl was now hers and she was now the one wrapped in prayers. She never too it off and when the pain came again she would cuddle it....she tells me it hasn't left her side since.

When I left the ward tears were shed by us all. I told my friend it was her job to love everyone now and as I was wheeled out of the ward I gave thanks to my Lord who had allowed me in my weakness to serve his lambs. Two days later my friend finally went home. We are in daily contact and plan to meet up when we are well enough.

I wanted to share this testimony for two reasons, firstly to honor Gods faithfulness and secondly to encourage anyone who is preparing to go into hospital. My story can be your story, I'm nothing special at all, quite the opposite but with the heart of Jesus beating inside us we can do anything - even from a hospital bed filed with tubes . This is only a brief synopsis of my story, every time I think of my time in hospital I am over whelmed by the blessings that my Lord showered on me and the encouragement he gave me in my walk with him.

My sincere prayer is that you will allow Him to do the same for you.....when he does email me...Id love to hear from you.....

:: The God of surprises ::

2012-01-20T11:59:00.000-08:00

The Three Trees.....

Once there were three trees on a hill in the woods. They were discussing their hopes and dreams when The first tree said, 'Someday I hope to be a great treasure chest. I could be filled with gold, silver and precious gems. I could be decorated with an intricate carving and everyone would see the beauty.'

Then the second tree said, 'Someday I will be a mighty ship. I will take Kings and Queens across the waters and sail to the corners of the world. People will feel safe in me because of the strength of my hull.'

Finally the third tree said, 'I want to grow to be the tallest and straightest Tree in the forest. People will see me on top of the hill, look up to my branches, and think of the heavens and God and how close to them I am reaching. I will be the greatest tree of all time and people will always remember me.'

After a few years of praying that their dreams would come true, a group of woodsmen came upon the trees.

When one came to the first tree he said, 'This looks like a strong tree, I think I should be able to sell the wood to a carpenter, and he began cutting it down. The tree was happy, because he knew the carpenter would make him into a treasure chest.

At the second tree the woodsman said, 'This looks like a strong tree. I will be able to sell it to the shipyard.'

The second tree was happy because he knew he was on his way to becoming a mighty ship.

When the woodsmen came upon the third tree, the tree was frightened because he knew that if they cut him down his dreams would not come true. One of the men said,'I don't need anything special from my tree, I'll take this one,' and he cut it down.

When the first tree arrived at the carpenters, he was made into a feed box for animals. He was then placed in a barn and filled with hay. This was not at all what he had prayed for. The second tree was cut and made into a small fishing boat. His dreams of being a mighty ship and carrying Kings had come to an end.The third tree was cut into large pieces, and left alone in the dark.

The years went by, and the trees forgot about their dreams.

Then one day, a man and woman came to the barn. She gave birth and they placed the baby in the hay in the feed box that was made from the first tree. The man wished that he could have made a crib for the baby, but this manger would have to do. The tree could feel the importance of this event and knew that it had held the greatest treasure of all time.

Years later, a group of men got in the fishing boat made from the second tree. One of them was tired and went to sleep. While they were out on the water, a great storm arose and the tree didn't think it was strong enough to keep the men safe The men woke the sleeping man, and he stood and said 'Peace' and the storm stopped. At this time, the tree knew that it had carried the King of Kings in its boat.

Finally, someone came and got the third tree. It was carried through the streets as the people mocked the man who was carrying it. When they came to a stop, the man was nailed to the tree and raised in the air to die at the top of a hill.

When Sunday came, the tree came to realize that it was strong enough to stand at the top of the hill and be as close to God as was possible, because Jesus had been crucified on it.

The moral of this story is that when things don't seem to be going your way, always know that God has a plan for you. If you place your trust in Him, God will give you great gifts. Each of the trees got what they wanted, just not in the way they had imagined. We don't always know what God's plans are for us.. We just know that His Ways are not our ways, but His ways are always best..

My friend sent me this story and I wanted to share.... my prayer is that God may inspire people on their way, perhaps this might just be the inspiration someone needs this day to carry the heavy burden they are struggling with, as we all must shoulder the crosses we have been required to carry along this journey called our lives...

:: The greatest gift of all ::

2011-12-23T02:42:00.000-08:00

In the beginning was the word
And the word was with God
And the word was God
The word was with God at the beginning
And through him all things were created.
No created thing came into being without him.
Be still and know
In the word was life,
And that life was the light of humankind.
The light shines in the darkness,
And the darkness has never put it out.
Be still and know
He was in the world;
But the world – though it owned its being to him
Did not recognise him.
He came to his own,
And his own people would not receive him,
He gave the right to become children of God,
Not through human desire, but through God alone.
Be still and know
So, the word became flesh;
He came along and was one of us.
And we saw his glory which befits Gods only son
Full of grace and truth.
Be still and know.

I remember when my daughter was little she often didn’t know where to start because she got so many presents at Christmas. I am sure we have also experienced very small children being happier with the cardboard boxes that the toys came in rather than the toys themselves. I find as we get older we tend to get less presents, perhaps just one big gift.
Last year I bought my husband this, it’s a DVD of Bruce Springsteen live in concert at Hyde Park. Actually my daughter and I put it on as soon as he opened it and perhaps got as much if not more pleasure than him watching it. I have always said that seeing Bruce in concert was top on my bucket list. I have loved his music since I was 17 and now the whole family loves him too. So you can understand my delight when a friend at work told me that he was doing a concert in Manchester in June and tickets were going on sale on December 9th. I was determined to go and spent the week that followed in great excitement. We had prepared well, because we knew how quickly the tickets would sell out, I got up at seven and sat by the computer waiting for them to go on sale, finally at 9am the moment arrived and we were there ready! As soon as you click the button that says you want the tickets there is a clock ticking in the corner of the computer screen telling you how much time you have to do the transaction, at 2 minutes past nine we bought the tickets, we went through the countless tasks, filling in our address visa card numbers and then at 8 minutes past nine at the card verification stage the computer froze. By the time we logged onto Pete’s computer at 12 minutes past nine all the tickets had all gone. My husband wanted to try again but I thought all was lost, my dream of seeing Bruce Springsteen dashed - so I had a paddy, but he kept trying and at 18 minutes nine past he got three tickets – we were going - I was overjoyed. So this year I have got the best Christmas present ever – My husband bought me Bruce Springsteen ticket, and I bought him one and we both bought our daughter one between us, so its an amazing present which we can all share, look forward to and enjoy. As a family we were delighted, we are so happy because we know how much these tickets are worth – especially as we nearly lost them, I was so excited, I couldn’t wait to tell my best friend that we had managed to get them.
I know that long after the concert is over we will hold that joy in our hearts and share this story and share the story of the experience of the concert with everyone. So we are very lucky and we have wonderful Christmas presents which will create memories and give us an experience which we will carry in our hearts for the rest of our lives.
But what do we do with those gifts that we don’t like, that we just cant see the value in although we know that the thought is there yet we wonder why on earth someone gave this gift to us? Often we put this gift away in a drawer not knowing what to do with it, it becomes and embarrassment, or maybe we discard it thinking its useless.
Or maybe you are lucky enough to receive something which cost a fortune and is so delicate and so precious that we put it away in a safe place and save it for special occasions? Like the best china or jewellery. There was an email which was doing the rounds some time ago from a man who had lost his wife and as he went through her things he reminisced about them, when he gave them to her and how much she loved them, but the sad thing was that she never got enjoyment from them because she kept them safely tucked away for special occasions. She was too afraid of losing them or damaging them that no occasion seemed special enough and so she missed the opportunity of enjoying them day after day as has her husband had intended when he gave her them.
Or we are like me with my Bruce Springsteen tickets, so delighted so overjoyed that we want to use the gift every day, to show everyone how beautiful it is and how wonderful it is how happy it makes us. Every time we look at it, it gives us joy, a joy that we cant help but share because we are so excited and the joy is so precious.
We have all been given an amazing gift today, even better than the Bruce Springsteen ticket we have been given a gift from God - the light of the world, Jesus. I wonder what you are going to do with that present this Christmas and in the years to come? Gods gift to us is so precious, it is the most wonderful gift that we will ever get in our lives, but lets not hide our Jesus away, lets not just get him out on Sunday or in places where we feel He will be safe and where we wont get broken or hurt. When we accepted this gift we accepted the commission to take this gift out into the world, to share this gift with those people that come into our lives, we mustn’t be afraid of what people may say or how they may react, because Jesus wont break, He wont spoil, He is constant and will be constant all the days of our lives. God didn’t give us this gift to keep safely tucked away, he gave us it to use, and this present will work in our lives so that we find ourselves having more gifts and being able to do things that we never dreamed we would do. This gift should abide with us all the days of our lives and by accepting and carrying this gift in our hearts God can work in us and through us in order to share this gift and bring more and more people to the kingdom.
So although I will look forward to my Bruce Springsteen concert in June, and it’s a wonderful Christmas present the gift from God is the best present I have ever received, I will never tire talking about it, this gift may have taken a long time to accept, but it will never go in the dustbin or be kept safely in the drawer.

:: A look of grief :::

2011-12-23T02:39:00.000-08:00

Mark 10 17: 31 - The Rich Man
17 As he was setting out on a journey, a man ran up and knelt before him, and asked him, "Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?" 18 Jesus said to him, "Why do you call me good? No one is good but God alone. 19 You know the commandments: 'You shall not murder; You shall not commit adultery; You shall not steal; You shall not bear false witness; You shall not defraud; Honor your father and mother.'" 20 He said to him, "Teacher, I have kept all these since my youth." 21 Jesus, looking at him, loved him and said, "You lack one thing; go, sell what you own, and give the money to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; then come, follow me." 22 When he heard this, he was shocked and went away grieving, for he had many possessions. 23 Then Jesus looked around and said to his disciples, "How hard it will be for those who have wealth to enter the kingdom of God!" 24 And the disciples were perplexed at these words. But Jesus said to them again, "Children, how hard it is to enter the kingdom of God! 25 It is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for someone who is rich to enter the kingdom of God." 26 They were greatly astounded and said to one another, "Then who can be saved?" 27 Jesus looked at them and said, "For mortals it is impossible, but not for God; for God all things are possible." 28 Peter began to say to him, "Look, we have left everything and followed you." 29 Jesus said, "Truly I tell you, there is no one who has left house or brothers or sisters or mother or father or children or fields, for my sake and for the sake of the good news, 30 who will not receive a hundredfold now in this age--houses, brothers and sisters, mothers and children, and fields with persecutions--and in the age to come eternal life. 31 But many who are first will be last, and the last will be first."
Holy Bible NRSV

This passage from Mark has always challenged me and like the rich young man I too have walked away from my reading of it feeling despondent. I think that this is because my underlining reaction has always been one of shame, assuming that Jesus was being highly critical of the rich young man and that unless we give everything away and follow him we can never have eternal life. The words have made me search myself and I find that I am ashamed to admit, I have great attachments to my material possessions and the security of a regular income. However after spending a lot of time with this scripture I don’t feel that this is the case at all. Jesus isn’t attacking the rich he is merely exposing the barrier which is preventing this rich young man from entering the kingdom – namely the love of money.
At the start of this scripture the rich man, runs up to Jesus, falls to his knees and asks: ‘Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?’ This man of great wealth, who is described as a ruler in Luke runs to Jesus and makes an extravagant address hungry to know how he might inherit eternal life. To understand the young mans question more we need to put it into context, by looking at what has just gone before, what has driven this young man to run to Jesus and fall to his feet burning with a question about eternal life. Jesus had just explained that in order to be saved we must first become like children, humble and pure of heart. Jesus suggests that when we become humble like a child we then rely on our Father in heaven, as a child relies on its parents. It is in this relationship, with God at the centre, that we can have eternal salvation, here on earth - now.
When the young man asks his question Jesus intrinsically sees his fatal flaw. He knew what was stopping him from having heaven on earth from being saved and having eternal life. In order to point out this mans sin Jesus repeats the last 6 commandments. The young man proudly tells Jesus that he has obeyed the commandments since he was a child. However, Jesus reveals that his love of money and power has prevented him from obeying the first commandment - to let nothing be more important than God,
This is because although he knew the law and had followed the law, his priorities were all wrong, he treasured possessions and money not God, the centre of his life was the love of money and we know from other scripture that the love of money is the root of all evil. Note its not having money that is evil, it’s the love of it which is the root of all evil and ultimately leads to our unhappiness. Because when money is more important than God and when the love of it is our priority above all things it can only lead to our downfall and destruction. Because if money and material possessions are our priority, what happens if we lose them all, or if it is taken away from us or destroyed? The love of God and the relationship with him can never be destroyed, can never be lost and He will always love us. We are told in the scripture that nothing can separate us from Gods Love, but we can so easily be separated from money. Jesus tells us that our treasures are stored in heaven not here on earth in bank accounts. We can have all the treasure that we need, the treasures that count if we follow him because these treasures are purchased with love by living a life like Jesus and following his example. But is seems just too hard for this rich man to put his trust in God, its hard because he believes, like many people do, that money and possessions are security, he puts his trust in having money. He doesn’t realise that his relationship with money is binding him and that to be free of these ties he must put his trust in God, just as a child trusts their parents.
The disciples are amazed at these words because if we put the situation into context a wealthy man was a symbol of success, wealth was a symbol of Gods approval and of Gods blessing. This is why they cannot understand why a rich man cannot enter the kingdom. But Jesus is turning this belief on its head when he suggests that it is only when you come before God as a child in dependence of him that you will receive eternal life.
When the young man tells Jesus that he has followed his commandments he is saying that he has never done any harm, but what good has he done? Jesus looks at him with love because he wants to save this rich young man and he wants him to turn his attention to God, he wants him to have a happy and fulfilled life, but he knows that this is too hard for the young man to do.
Sometimes the truth hurts but it’s always better to know the truth from the start. Christ had the compassion to do this. To the young man and the disciples to give all you have to the poor seems a little drastic and that is perhaps what we struggle with when we first reads this scripture. But I think that what Jesus really wants for the young man is for him to give up the love of his money and his attachment to it, his fear of losing it and the security it brings. I can well understand the fear of giving up a comfortable income and lifestyle to serve God. But Jesus knows that by replacing the love of money with the love of God the man will be transformed leading him to a life of fulfilment and joy which is worth its weight in Gold. But Jesus sees the young man worships money and that his god is money, He feels compassion because he already knows what the man is going to do. The young man is disappointed because he knows he hasn’t the strength to make this great sacrifice. Sadly he cannot accept the gift of grace which is freely given because he is tethered to money.
So what is this scripture saying to us, today? Is Jesus asking us to give everything away to the poor? Or is he asking us to examine ourselves and identify those things in our lives which stop us from being close to him? I think for all of us there is often one thing which we feel is impossible to sacrifice, but to do so sets us free. In October I talked to you about how we can bear fruit, the answer then was the answer now, to put all our attachments at the cross and allow God to abide with us, to let God take the driving seat. Sometimes the sacrifice is forgiveness, or a hard heart, anger or jealousy, for each of us it is different, for this man it’s the love of money was stopping him from abiding with God.
Two weeks ago I talked about gifts, what we could give to God this Advent, as we prepare for the coming of our Lord, today I am suggesting the gift could be letting go of something, facing our fears and trusting in God. During our prayer time lets ask God what might be our master, what might be the thing, large or small which is holding us back from having a fulfilled and fruitful relationship with God. Let us take that thing and put it at the foot of the cross where is belongs so we can be set free, free so God can abide with us, free to bear the fruits he has intended us to.
I want to leave you with what comforts me and inspires me in this passage, the personal message that it has for me in my walk. In my minds eye I see Christ looking at this young man and loving him. He loved him knowing what his response will be, He loved him enough to give him tough advice and speak the truth to him, some may say this was tough love. Perhaps there was also a look of sadness and regret as Christ gazed on this young man and saw what could have been. I don’t know about you but I feel this is the saddest part of this scripture, you can almost see Jesus hold his gaze on the young man as he walks away into the distance head held low, slowly becoming a speck until he disappears. William Barclay sums this look for me perfectly :
It was a look of grief. And that grief was the grief that is the sorest grief of all – the grief of seeing a man deliberately choose to fail to be what he might have been and had it in him to be. Jesus looks at us with the appeal of love, with the challenge to the knightliness of the Christian way. God grant that He may never have to look at us with the sorrow of one who looks at a loved one who refuses to be what he might have been and could have been.
I often tell people I have a good twenty years left in me and I want to give those twenty years to God because I don’t want to end my days with feelings of regret and wondering what could have been if I had had the courage to say yes.
What will you say yes to today?

:: Advent 1 - Gifts ::

2011-12-02T00:40:00.000-08:00

Have you ever been in the awful situation when someone gives you a Christmas present and you didn’t buy them one? It’s so embarrassing - I don’t know about you but I never know quite what to say or what to do in that situation. Do we rush out and get something the next day and pretend we had it at home all the time or do we say thank you and own up that we haven’t bought anything in return? But why should we feel like this? Doesn’t the bible teach us that we don’t give to receive? Shouldn’t the giving be the joy? Shouldn’t our giving be from the heart to show people that we love them, that they are special and that we care about them? To be honest I enjoying giving presents far more than receiving them. I love picking something out that I hope my loved one will like, or spending ages making something special, the nights I have spent into the early hours trying to finish knitting something for my daughter. Then I love to wrap the parcel up so that it looks lovely - I can’t wait to see the face of my friend or family member when they open it. It brings me so much joy – to me this is enough in return for the gift that I have given. Receiving something back isn’t the point for me.
As I prepared for this sermon, I thought about Gods great gift to us all – the gift that we never tire of talking about, the precious gift of the light of the world. I thought about His excitement when He sees us receive this gift when we accept His son as our lord and saviour. The delight that He must feel as He see’s us use His gifts, the over flowing love that He has for us – the joy that He must feel from those who love him and thank him for the most wonderful gift that we could ever receive. I remember somone saying that the angels dance and rejoice in heaven when someone is saved. What a wonderful image.
But I feel that the society we live in is trying to steal that joy from us. Society is actually robbing us of the heart felt joy of giving because from August onwards it seems to me that we are bombarded from every direction with what to buy, what to give, how to show our love, how to show our gratitude how to show we care. And how do we show it? We show it by spending more money than we can afford on more than we need. They want us to try to replace the joy and love of the Christmas message with greed and want.
As Christians we know the true spirit of Christmas, we know that Advent isn’t all about endless shopping lists, frenzied shopping trips wearing out our credit cards and spending money we don’t have. We know that Advent is a time of preparing ourselves spiritually to receive the greatest gift we could ever receive - Gods gift - the light of the world. This gift is freely given and God doesn’t expect a present back, His joy is seeing us receive the gift, to celebrate the receiving and to use the gifts we are given. Gods gift did cost the earth, but was given to save the earth.
But for so many people Advent, and the lead up to Christmas has become a very stressful time. A time of great pressure, rather than joy, a time of endless lists of Christmas cards and presents, of festive food and drink, of menus and celebrations and of course making sure we have the money to pay for it all. Somehow the spirit of Christmas seems to be completely lost in this world we live in. A world which is completely obsessed with commercialism, making everything bigger and better so that every Christmas the latest gadget is new and improved and a must have on every letter to Santa. Nothing ever seems good enough and the wanting seems to go on and on.
It makes me very sad that amongst all this greed and envy, want and desire my Jesus gets lost, the good news of his birth is hidden under television adverts for the latest iphone or Nintendo D.S., emails from comet telling us what everyone wants for Christmas or billboards encouraging us to buy that new sofa now, so we have it in time for Christmas. The greatest gift ever given to mankind is forgotten in the mad dash to fill our supermarket trolleys at Morrisons because they are closed for one day at Christmas and we don’t want to run out of food do we! To me, and for many other people the Christ is often left out of Christmas.
I actually avoid city centres at Christmas if I can because I find this atmosphere of greed quite repulsive, especially when you see, only a few hundred yards away some poor soul living on the streets without a penny to their name. Last year I visited St Georges Crypt with a delivery of toys from our school. I was overwhelmed as I went into this huge hall filled with donations of gifts which those on a low income can take for their children at Christmas. Isn’t that what Jesus would ask us to do? Didn’t he tell us to give our brother the shirt off our backs? But instead the crowds walk on by with credit cards at the ready laden with bags of things they don’t need, or want or that they can’t afford. The commercial world would be quite happy to leave Christ out of Christmas!
But we aren’t going to let them are we? Because our Christian values are not about greed and having, our beliefs are the opposite – we see worth and value in very different things. So we cant sit back in amazement and watch as people go into mad frenzies, spending too much money panicking about Christmas dinner what to wear what to buy for people what to watch on TV. If we are appalled by their behaviour and attitude then we should do what Paul commissioned the believers in Corinth to do. To share Gods blessings because if we aren’t telling them about the true spirit of Christmas, and if we aren’t sharing the good news with them who will?
This society that we live in, which is consumed by consumerism may not be very much different to the society in Corinth which Paul speaks of in the scripture we heard today. Corinth was a very prosperous port which was a cultural melting pot, with a great diversity of wealth and of religious and moral standards. The busy port entertained many visitors, including wealthy merchants with time and money on their hands which led to it becoming a hot bed of corruption and sin. Idolatry flourished and there were dozens of pagan temples which employed thousands of prostitutes, in fact Corinth was famous for its prostitutes who were known as the Corinthian girls.
In this passage Paul is encouraging the believers in Corinth to have spiritual unity and to behave with a Christ-like character in this town rich with money, overflowing in greed, being dominated by lust and paganism. He reminds the followers that they have been given the gift of Grace and he encourages them that in a world of noise confusion and relentless pressures that people are actually deeply longing for peace. Like the believers in Corinthian we too have all been blessed by God and given the spiritual gifts that we need to witness to Christ, to walk a Christian line through the streets of glitter and gold, bright lights and tempting Christmas offers. We too are commissioned to show the world around us an alternative way of living that is not obsessed with wanting and having the latest and greatest new fad.
Paul is commissioning his fellow Christians in Corinth to firmly establish the message of Jesus. He sees that the people of Corinth are receiving their blessing, they were not receiving the wonderful gift that God had given them, they were consumed with other things, worldly things, they had become consumed with sin. Paul tells them that the world isn’t receiving Gods blessing because Christ isn’t established as their Lord and saviour. So he encourages his friends to establish those blessings in their lives, to share their God given gifts and share them with those around them so that the message of Jesus is in their hearts and so that they too can receive Gods gifts, Gods blessings.
As Christians I think it is vital that we demonstrate that the gift of Christ’s birth is not only central to our Christmas celebrations, but our whole lives because as Christians we not only keep Jesus in our Christmas celebrations but for all the days of our lives, day after day. How do we do this? we do this by keeping him present in our lives day after day, daily revealing the gifts he gave us, the character, the love and the spirit of Christ that dwells in us, we do this by allowing these traits to shine through our actions. By giving the poor soul in the door way a cup of tea and by giving them the time of day or bringing in gifts for the shoe boxes or the toy appeal.
In 2 Corinthians 8 : 7 Paul says: “See that you also excel in this grace of giving.”
In my last sermon I spoke to you about the fruit and the vine. I asked if we were bearing fruit? Surely our response to this is more pressing as we prepare for advent. Surely our response to this gift given to us from the heart of our God, surely this should be to bear fruit, to share our gifts to set the people free by lifting the yoke which consumerism has set about their necks. If we as Christians don’t show them the spirit of Christmas then who will?
This Christmas I am sure we will all been blessed with gifts and celebrations with our families. But this year, as we prepare for the coming of the light of the world, I would like us to give God a present. As we come to a time of prayer I would like you to think about giving God one very special gift. Just one from you to him. It wont cost any money but it will cost sacrifice. I have made some little gift tags, which you were given when you came in. One is for you to take home and put in your bibles, this one is to remind you every day of the gift you want to give to God. Let this gift be something personal that no one else needs to know about, and let it be a sacrifice. David said in 2 Samuel v24 that he would not offer a sacrifice to God that cost him nothing.
For example, maybe your gift to God will be to forgive someone you've needed to forgive for a long time. You may discover that you've given a gift back to yourself. Corrie Ten Boom, a Christian who survived extreme brutality in a German concentration camp after rescuing many Jews from certain death during the Nazi Holocaust was an incredible woman and witness to her faith in God, after the war she was able to forgive her persecutors and say, "Forgiveness is to set a prisoner free, and to realize the prisoner was you."
Or you could give time. I recently heard of a church in a big city. The older members of the church, who found they didn’t sleep at night decided to open the doors of their church at closing time. They offered hot tea and comfort to young people at closing time. They moped the tears of the girls who had been dumped, calmed down the lads who had been in a fight and sobered up those who had had one too many. Because the gift they had was the gift of time, they had the time and the wisdom to know how to listen, they knew the right words to say and they knew how to use their gifts to heal broken hearts and angry hearts and lonely hearts. They befriended theses young people, who regularly went started to go to the church every weekend and eventually – you guessed it the young people gave their lives to Jesus and started going to church on a Sunday morning instead. I believe that our gifts to God will change over the years but everyone, from the oldest to the youngest member of our church family, everyone has something to give. The one thing that some people here today have is time, something I spend my life chasing after. What a wonderful gift. You have no idea what a blessing it is. I regularly spend time with my friend Marion and she always has time for me, and she will always listen to all my worries and woes and she gives always gives me good advice sharing her years of experiences and wisdom. To me the gifts that she has and shares with me are priceless.
Or perhaps your gift will be to commit to spending more time with God every day. It doesn’t matter what it is, because it’s between you and God – but I encourage you to make this your most important gift of the season.
The other tag has a tie, it is for you to tie onto the tree of promises which I have made for our church. All you have to write on the tag is the message that you usually write on gift tags and your name. After the intercessions the children will come back in with their tags and we can all tie our gift tags to the tree together as a family. Each week the tree of promises will remind us of our gift, our promise to God as we prepare for Advent and they will remind us of the coming of the light of the world and the amazing gift that our gracious God gave to us.

:: Fruits ::

2011-10-02T01:06:00.000-07:00

This is the first of my placement sermons which I will be using as part of my assignments in the module on preaching - enjoy and may you be blessed as I was:

“I am the true grapevine, and my Father is the gardener. 2 He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more. 3 You have already been pruned and purified by the message I have given you. 4 Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.
5 “Yes, I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. 6 Anyone who does not remain in me is thrown away like a useless branch and withers. Such branches are gathered into a pile to be burned. 7 But if you remain in me and my words remain in you, you may ask for anything you want, and it will be granted! 8 When you produce much fruit, you are my true disciples. This brings great glory to my Father
::

Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit.

But if we are really honest with ourselves, we as individuals bearing fruit to Gods glory?
If we don’t feel that we are bearing fruit, then have we forgotten something, or are we doing something wrong?

We have a fruit tree in our garden, every year it bears fruit, more fruit than we will ever eat or need. We never do anything to it, we just let it be a fruit tree and it does what a fruit tree should do. We didn’t buy it, it was in our garden when we bought our house, it didn’t cost us a penny. So we give the fruit away, we share it, we bless others with this gift that came to us free of charge. We want other people to enjoy our apples and nothing gives us greater joy and more pleasure than when people tell us what they did with their apples and how much they and their loved ones enjoyed eating them. The apples are our gift and people’s pleasure in them is our blessing.
On the first day of my course in September we spent a whole day meditating and discussing and praying over this scripture. What I learnt that day was too good to keep to myself. In fact the lecturer commissioned us to go home and preach to our churches on this gospel. She said it was our responsibility to share it, and I think she is right. It was given freely to the class so that we might use it to bear fruit in our lives. It was given freely and I want to share it, I want you to enjoy and I want you to be blessed by what I learnt. Because it opened a door for me it was a light bulb moment when everything clicked into place and my prayer is that something in what I share today may be a light bulb moment for one of you too.
We often try to live like Old Testament Christians. By that I mean that we try to do things in our own strength, and then when things don’t work out the way we want them to we wander around the wilderness lost, never really learning never really moving forward just going round and round In circles ending up at the same place again and again, facing similar situations behaving in similar ways. That’s because we sometimes forget about the great truth, the Golden rule - which is letting God rule, under grace and not the law. When we follow the golden rule, when we rest in the grace of God we allow Him to rule and we allow Him to work in us from the inside out.
I know one of the ways which I walk as an Old Testament Christian is wanting Justice when people hurt me or others. But Jesus asked us to deal with hurt through forgiveness and through love. I know that this can be incredibly hard at times and I have spoken of it before, but it is only through this that the truth can set us free.
But my main problem with forgiveness is that although I can forgive others for hurting me I just can’t forgive myself. I know that I can forgive by will, but this doesn’t make me free and if I am not free then I can’t be free to love unconditionally. When this happens I can’t be a source of grace to those I forgive. I understand Gods forgiveness in my head but I have really struggled with understanding it in my heart. Like a stain in my favourite shirt, it faded with a squirt of vanish but it didn’t come out and every time I wear it I don’t enjoy wearing it as much as I did, because I feel angry with myself for getting a mark on it, I feel angry because I didn’t realise I had done it and I feel angry because I didn’t deal with it immediately because the stain remains and I cant get it out, because others may see the stain and judge me, because the stain has made the blouse less than perfect in my eyes. But we are perfect in Gods eyes, and I can’t ever get the stains in my life out by myself, only He can, and I have to let go and stop trying myself and let Him do it in his own way and his own timing. Because He wants to cleanse us so we can join with him. Sometimes we take part of Gods forgiveness but we can’t accept it all. We get used to living with the stains. But these stains effect the way that we abide with God and so we can’t bear the fruit that he intended us to. Because when people see Gods forgiveness in us they would see grace in action. When they see grace in action, they will want some for themselves and this is where we bear fruit and where we can share that fruit just as God intended.
God wants to forgive us so that we can be joined with him so that there is nothing between us and him, so that he can speak to us, be intimate with us and so that he can work through us and we can bear fruit. If we are bound up with guilt and self loathing then he can’t get near to us, our guilt is in the way, its taking up the space that God wants so that he can get close to us, so that he can develop his relationship with us. The fruit we bear is an outcome of our relationship with God. A plant can’t grow if its root bound in a tiny pot. It needs space to grow and God needs space so that we can grow with him and through Him.
I have an example. My year 13 ‘A’ level group are some of the most talented students that I have ever worked with. They have the potential to come out with grade A*’s and B’s for the unit which I am teaching them at the moment. But there has been a big argument between the girls. Apparently one of the girls has been heard saying something unkind about the other girls. This has caused a terrible atmosphere in the group. Now I believe the only way to sort out something like this is to bring it into the light. You have to lance the boil, it may hurt but if you don’t it will grow and it will fester and when it bursts there will be a lot of damage. So I brought the girls together and we had a big discussion, we brought the accusations out into the light, chairs were thrown and angry words said people stormed out doors were slammed. The negative atmosphere lasted for another lesson, the guilt the anger the hatred the regret all permeated the group. Result – no one created any work and what they did create was poor – why? Because their bad feelings towards each other and towards the situation was preventing them form being creative, from using their gifts. The good news is that we had another discussion, which went a lot better and I sprinkled the teachings of Jesus over them and talked things through again and they listened. I am happy to say that the wounds are now healing and they are being creative again. However, one girl in particular, who I am very fond of, wouldn’t let go of her pain, she couldn’t put it down. She was physically bound, you could see it, she couldn’t speak to anyone or share with the group, she withdrew completely and she was having an awful time in her drama lessons, the pain was really hurting her. What was worse was that she wouldn’t talk to me she wouldn’t make eye contact with me – I could see that she felt guilty and she thought I was judging her. So I took her to one side and we went somewhere quiet to talk and she told me although she was fighting this part of her nature she couldn’t win, she couldn’t let go of the pain even though it was hurting her. She wouldn’t accept that she had been forgiven and I had put the situation down, she couldn’t accept that I was really fond of her and I wanted her to do really well in her drama exam, I wanted her to love her drama lessons, I wanted her to be happy to be creative. Result - She didn’t create anything, she couldn’t create anything and yet she was my most talented student. She couldn’t bear fruit because she wouldn’t allow herself to be close to us any more. After a long talk and a hug I got close to her again, she asked me to pray for her, and I do. The following lesson was back to normal and she was being creative – she was bearing fruit.
The effect of not forgiving and holding onto those stains stops us from bearing the fruits God intended us to and we become bound. This is an example of a relationship between one of my students and myself. When she let me get close to her again she made space for me to teach her and help her to bear fruits in her work. Imagine what fruits we can bear if we allow ourselves to accept Gods forgiveness. Imagine what fruits we will bear if we allow God to work in us? It blows me away when I think of what he could do in me if I could shift out all the rubbish that I still hang onto.
Sin causes a barrier between us and God, Satan loves nothing more than this and he sets us up to fall- his greatest joy is to cause us to sin because he knows that this keeps us from God. Because he knows what we do with that stain, that sin. What do we do with a stain? Do we deal with it immediately and we get it out, or we leave it in the dark wash basket where it has time to work itself into every fibre and washing it out becomes more and more difficult – even impossible.
I just want us to take time to read the passage below and pray over it:
‘But he was wounded for our transgressions, crushed for our iniquities: upon him was the punishment that made us whole, and by his bruises we are healed.’
Isaiah 58
When I read that passage I wept, I suddenly truly understood, I had my light bulb moment. If we don’t accept Christ dying on the cross for us then it was a waste. We must understand that forgiveness is a free gift. Why do we feel that we have to earn it? This is old testament thinking, old testament living - we don’t have to earn Gods acceptance, because we have it already - its free and it was paid for on the cross. If it’s finished its finished and if it’s freely given we should be accepting it in our lives and in turn we should be giving it away – we should be bearing fruit. This gift is not for us to keep, it’s come from God and it’s a wonderful gift that he wants us to share with others. Jesus never said to anyone ‘try harder’. I have spent year trying to be a good person, praying every day to be a good Christian, trying every day in my own strength, then failing and feeling useless and defeated. But I was living by the old testament I hasn’t realised that by the flesh I would never be able to do things it is only through the spirit can we do them. We have to end out old lives and start our new one. How do we do this? We do this by accepting Gods grace, by leaving behind our old life and our old ways.
I know that God had to bring me to my knees, to the very end of my strength so that He could say to me that dark night at three in the morning in a hotel room in Germany – ‘I want space in your head for me’. Only when I was broken, only then when I was literally lying on the floor in desperation and despair , only when I stopped trying to do things in my own strength only then did I hear Him, did I listen to Him did I give him that space,. Only then did he start working miracles in my life. We couldn’t both live in the same space, because the space was filled with my junk, He couldn’t abide in me and I couldn’t bear fruit. But when I stopped trying, God started to do it for me. We can tame our old nature, our anger or jealousy but when provoked it comes out again. But if we let God deal with our nature, no matter how much we are provoked it wont and it can’t come out. What hinders us from bearing fruit – hanging on to our old nature. So what is the answer?
The cross. Because at the cross our old nature died and the new nature was born. Christ in us, Christ working through us. This was my light bulb moment, I had understood here (head) but suddenly the penny dropped and I under stood here (Heart). I understood I had already left my old life and my old nature behind at the cross when I was baptised. I realised that my sins had been forgiven and I had been washed clean. But I couldn’t give up some things from my old life, one of the things that I couldn’t give up was what I thought I was doing well, that I thought I was good at. I wanted to keep some of my old life but it must all go to make the space for God to abide with us. The good and the bad and the quicker we do it the quicker He can start working on us. You see I always thought that I was a great teacher, I am ashamed to say I was really arrogant about it and filled with pride. But the arrogance and pride stopped God from making me an amazing teacher and using my gifts properly, for His glory and not mine. I had to be broken because it was only when I was broken and when I allowed God to take up the space in my life that my pride and arrogance had filled it was only then that my cracked pot could really bear fruit. I now know and can physically feel that I am teaching through Gods strength and I can see the difference, my ego and arrogance had to go and I had to submit to God so that He could make me the teacher He wanted me to be, so I could bear His fruit, so He could shine through my cracked pot. I couldn’t have blessed my 6th form group a couple of years ago because I wouldn’t have prayed and I wouldn’t have asked God to deal with it His way, I would have done it my way and it wouldn’t have worked, those girls wouldn’t have seen God working through me. The result of letting God deal with it was that one of the girls said to me later ‘I really love the way you explain things miss – they make sense and they are full of love. Not my love – His love, shining through my cracked pot. God hasn’t taken the gift of teaching away from me, He has made it better because now He is in the driving seat He is working through me and in me. It was so hard for me to give this up, I wanted to hold on to it, because I thought that teaching was the only thing in my life that I thought I could do. I didn’t really understand. But once I understood – I had it all, but I had to give it up, I had to leave everything at the cross, the good and the bad, the things I couldn’t wait to get rid of and the things I desperately wanted to keep. Letting go set me free. If you are struggling with this then I ask you to pray over it or ask me or one of the church family to pray with you about it – use the prayer corner, use your family to stand with you.
When you can’t do anything, God can do Everything. It’s the ‘I’ that holds us back. Stop trying to get to there by yourself – because you are already there. Stop trying to do everything in your own strength. God knows what you need to change and He will do it in his own time, He will deal with these things in his timing, at different times and at different seasons He will take them from us and He will do the impossible.
Your old nature may come back from time to time but Jesus can deal with it instantly, these weeds have no roots now we don’t have to wrestle and fight – Jesus will pull them out instantly. He will set us free, the truth will set you free. Don’t try and change things in your own strength - get on your knees and ask God to change them. You can’t do it because you were never supposed to . All we have is Jesus and that is all we need.
Clay pots will show Gods glory He will transform us from the inside out, inside in that space that we give Him, He will transform us – but from within. I really want to encourage you to carry the presence of Jesus within, abide in Jesus, let him gently work in you. Because when we carry him He will work in us and He will change our anger or greed into compassion and love. He needs the body of Christ to carry him, he needs the cracked pots, he wants the clay pots because He will use us the clay pots to His glory. We will never graduate from being a clay pot, we are supposed to be clay pots. But when we remember this, when we let God have space within our clay pots we will see beyond our wildest dreams. We are not working for God – we couldn’t do it anyway – God wants to work in us – but he needs space and when we give Him this space we will bear fruit. This truth will set you free.
So lets take some time to read the words on the screen quietly and lets take some time to pray and reflect on them. Lets start, together this morning, lets make space for God to come to us now to speak to us now, to start changing us now. I pray that each and every one of you will start to know and enjoy where God has put you through His grace and I pray that you will start making that space for him to abide in you now, this minute so that you and I can bear fruit. Amen

:: Finding your way home ::

2011-08-30T00:43:00.000-07:00

I will be taking a service this Sunday in preparation for our 'Back to church service', where we welcome back the prodigals and bring home the lost sheep.

So Jesus told them this story: “If a man has a hundred sheep and one of them gets lost, what will he do? Won’t he leave the ninety-nine others in the wilderness and go to search for the one that is lost until he finds it? And when he has found it, he will joyfully carry it home on his shoulders. When he arrives, he will call together his friends and neighbours, saying, ‘Rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep.’ In the same way, there is more joy in heaven over one lost sinner who repents and returns to God than over ninety-nine others who are righteous and haven’t strayed away!

I can still clearly remember when I was lost and I regularly thank the Lord for the day that I was found and for the people who helped me to find my way home. I spent twenty years wandering in the wilderness, going round in circles, bumping into things, taking the wrong paths, seeing chinks of light but then turning away back into the shadows.
But during those twenty years when I was lost I now see that the Lord was faithful, he searched for me and he sent his people to help him. Looking back I can now see that he placed Christians in my life who guided me, who counselled me and encouraged me. These people, without knowing, all had a part to play in my journey, they all helped to show me the way home.
Sometimes I fought against them, I would argue with them, I even lost my temper on occasions. Sometimes I tired to reason and debate – but it took twenty years before I listened and heard the truth. It took twenty years before I finally heard a knock at the door, I heard a voice, I went to the door and my Lord stood there with a full heart to forgive me and open arms to welcome me home.
Just as it says in Revelations 3
Here I am! I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me.
I clearly remember that Monday evening as if it was yesterday and this painting by William Holman Hunt came to me that night when I was saved, I kept seeing it in my minds eye over and over again. The painting depicts Jesus, the light of the world, standing at a door which is overgrown with ivy and weeds. The door represented the door to my new life with Jesus. He standing and he was waiting at that door all the time, and for all that time ivy and weeds had tried to seal it and prevent it from being opened. But he was patient and he was faithful, he put his trust in his search party and he waited. He searched for me and he waited for me, for all those years, he heard me scorn him, turn away from him and follow a different path and yet he still waited and when I opened the door he forgave me, he held me in his arms, set me on his shoulders and took me home. When I think about it, it blows me away, how I wish I had listened earlier. Notice that there is no handle on the outside of the door; I had to open the door from the inside to let Jesus into my life. We have the freedom to choose. It took me twenty years to open the door and I can never put into words how grateful I am to those who directed me towards that door and encouraged me to open it and so it is fitting that I share this testimony with you today as we prepare for our back to church service, as we as a church family prepare to bring the lost sheep home for the Good Shepherd.
There is an exercise that I do in my drama lessons. It was developed by a Russian practitioner called Konstantin Stanislavski who trained actors to perform in the style of realism. It takes the form of two similar activities. The first is to ask for a volunteer who is then asked to search for a twenty pound note which has been previously hidden in the room. They are given two minutes to do so. The volunteer does a wonderful ‘performance’ and we – the audience discuss what techniques they used in their performance. They are then given new information, there actually is twenty pounds in the room and if they find it they can have it. ( I am always very anxious at this point in case they find it!) The ‘performance’ now becomes reality – the actor believes there is a twenty pound note and so what we the audience observe is completely different, there is a sense of urgency and passion, the actor has focus they are determined to find the twenty pound note and they leave no stone unturned. Even when the two minutes are up they still try to have one last look such is their desire to find the twenty pound note.
As I was preparing for this service I thought about this exercise, about my students dashing around my studio trying to find the twenty pounds, their faces when it is revealed, when they find it was there all the time, they just didn’t find it – this time. I think they would have kept looking all day if they could because they wanted to find it so much. This scripture tells us that Jesus’ desire is to find the lost sheep, he loves us so much that he came down from heaven, leaving his Father to save the lost. No one is outside his love, his desire is to seek and to save and to bring his lambs home.
I think that this scripture has three points to make. At face value the message is clear, the good shepherd will leave the 99 sheep in his flock while he goes in search for the lost sheep and he will rejoice when the sheep is found. We see the determination of the shepherd to find the sheep no matter what – just like my students looking for that twenty pound note. But he doesn’t rush around in a fury like my drama students, he is patient and enduring, but like them he will never give up. When he finds the sheep and brings him home His great compassion forgives the sheep for going off on their own, for not listening to his calls, for trying to find his own path for being disobedient. He is just happy that he has found the sheep and that the sheep has returned to the flock. I don’t believe that this sheep means more to him than the rest of the flock, he rejoices in the fact that the sheep has been saved. I am sure we have all had an experience of losing something. It’s a horrible feeling, especially when it is something precious, we search everywhere, turn the house upside down. When we finally find the object we are over the moon and it becomes all the more valuable because it was lost and has been found. We realise how important it was to us we are determined that we will be more careful with it in future. The value in the object is in the fact that it has been found, the rejoicing is in the finding and bringing it home.
If we look deeper into the scripture we too can have compassion for the lost sheep, alone and afraid in the dark not knowing what to do like the little sheep in our children’s talk. In a way we can understand the temptations that the world offers in order to turn us from Christ, just like the little sheep who just wants to win the game and gain some status amongst her peers. But how quickly can you become lost when you start to head in the wrong direction and soon it feels to late to turn back, you are too afraid of the repercussions you are too ashamed of your actions. But we know that Jesus will always forgive and it is this compassion that I want to focus on this morning. I want us to use our understanding and our compassion for the lost to drive us to become the Lords search party because I feel that there is also a commission in this scripture. From my own experience of being Lost I believe that God also uses his followers to take part in being in the bigger search party . As we prepare for the ‘Back to church service’ I want to focus on this element of the scripture as we at Trinity become part of that bigger search party.
When I was lost for all that time, I knew there was something else out there, I knew that there had to be more to life than the life I was leading and my search took me to many different faiths and religions. It’s a dark place, you can’t see things straight, life can become distorted and what you think is the right path doesn’t bring the light or the peace that the journey with Jesus does. But God will always send out a search party, his angels who hold lanterns up on our path, who guide us, who show us the way and lead us towards him. I know this because I can remember each and every one of those angels and the lanterns that they held up. I am ashamed to say that I also remember thinking I knew best, turning from them and taking a different route. But those lanterns still shone brightly and their light was never wasted.
I think of them as gardeners and like gardeners each and every one of them had a different job in order to bring me back into the Lords garden. Some of them were there at the beginning of my journey preparing the ground, others were there along the way planting seeds. Tiny seeds as small as a mustard seed and they grew, those that didn’t were planted again and again and as new gardeners’ came along and they in turn tended and nurtured the seeds, they watered them, pulled out the weeds, cut out the dead leaves, poured the love and light of Jesus onto the seeds and finally when the time was right a gardener came and harvested the seedling and brought it home to the garden. We never know whether we are a gardener who prepares the soil or who plants the seed, who nurtures and cares for it or harvests it. But without all those gardeners the seed can never grow.
My dearest friend prayed faithfully for 8 years for me to meet the lord and come to faith. An impossible prayer you would think at the time … I was a senior Buddhist Leader, I had a strong faith I had been practicing this religion for 16 years, I had brought people to faith and I was responsible for the faith and practice of members in the North of England. But her faith, her determination and her obedience were bigger than that. She continued to pray and she drew her church around her and together they prayed me back home. She and her church tended the seeds that had been slowly planted for twenty years, she took out the dead leaves and poured the light of Jesus into my life through scripture and testimonies and yet it was someone else who finally reaped the harvest, another member of the search party who took me on the final part of my journey to the door of salvation and which I opened finally bringing me home to Jesus.
So as we prepare for the return to church service, we mustn’t be precious about what kind of gardener we are. It must have been so hard for Helen, after all those years to find it was someone else who was with me in those final steps, but she rejoiced in my salvation and she was content with the vital part that she played in my journey, and now continues to make, by my side. It doesn’t matter which role we take, the important part is being obedient to God and being part of the search party which brings home those lost sheep who he patiently and lovingly waits for at the other side of the door to salvation.
Never limit God, Helen didn’t, she made the impossible possible through faith and constant prayer, never limit God, he can work miracles he brought me home and he will bring home all those lost sheep out there waiting to be found. We have such a wonderful opportunity as a church to pull together and pray together and work together to fulfil Gods commission. We must leave no stone unturned, we must be open to Gods word because He will guide us and He will show us how we can guide and bring the lost home again, so that they might know His love and salvation. God will never stop looking for those lost sheep, He will never give up on them, He will always pursue them and He will bring them home. But the good shepherd also asks us to help in the search for those lost sheep, He asks us to be faithful and strong in leading them home. To be brave enough to plant those seeds, to be consistent and faithful enough to say those prayers day after day. We never know what that passing word can mean to the lost, that phone call made just at the right time, or a conversation during a chance meeting, those lost lambs are out there in the dark lost and alone needing us to bring them back to God. Needing us to bring them home to the good shepherd who waits for them to welcome them home and restore them.
Years ago when I started to come to Trinity God gave me a very, very clear picture. I was stood over there near Neil’s piano, I was looking at the alter and then I turned round to see that the church was full – every pew was filled and I was so happy, I can’t tell you how happy I felt and I heard God say ‘you will be a part of this Helen’. It is my prayer that this picture will become a reality at the ‘back to church service’ that Zoe is organising. It is my prayer that the church will be full and that we as a family will all be part of the filling of those pews. I pray that together we will listen to the Lord and we will bring home those lost sheep who are crying out in the dark. Lets stand together and make that picture that God gave me a reality and as a church family lets have obedient hearts burning to serve the lord and bring the lost home.

Let us pray
Lord Jesus, give us thankful hearts for those who helped us on our journey and helped us to know you and follow you, give us obedient hearts to serve you and courage to step out in faith to bring those lost sheep home. As we listen to the words of this song speak to us, guide us and show us who we can bring home.

:: Turning towards the light ::

2011-07-14T03:23:00.000-07:00

After sending the people away, he went up a hill by himself to pray. When evening came, Jesus was there alone; and by this time the boat was far out in the lake, tossed about by the waves, because the wind was blowing against it. Between three and six o'clock in the morning Jesus came to the disciples, walking on the water. When they saw him walking on the water, they were terrified. It's a ghost! they said, and screamed with fear. Jesus spoke to them at once. Courage! he said. It is I. Don't be afraid! Then Peter spoke up. Lord, if it is really you, order me to come out on the water to you. Come! answered Jesus. So Peter got out of the boat and started walking on the water to Jesus. But when he noticed the strong wind, he was afraid and started to sink down in the water. Save me, Lord! he cried. At once Jesus reached out and grabbed hold of him and said, What little faith you have! Why did you doubt? They both got into the boat, and the wind died down. Matthew 14:22-32

There are times in our lives when even the bravest and most fearless of us are afraid. There are times when everything in our lives suddenly seems dark and heavy. It seems as if the light has slowly ebbed away into nothing, we are lost in the darkness and we cannot see our way out. Everything weighs us down, everything is insurmountable. The waves lash over us, the storm rages around us and we long for still, calm, cool waters to sooth us and bring us peace. We start to sink into the dark waters, as everything piles up on top of us, everything in our lives seems negative, everything seems impossible, everything becomes frightening as we feel that we are sinking deeper and deeper.
I think Peter must have felt like this as he walked towards Jesus that night in Galilee, one minute he was walking on water, then suddenly everything goes dark as he starts to sink into the sea. It’s a horrible place to be, I know because I have experienced that dark place - but the good news is that this scripture tells us what we should do when we become afraid and when we see no way out of situations, this scripture shows us how we can leave the darkness and step out into the light.
I think that this is a really important piece of scripture because there is so much in it to encourage us when we experience difficulties and feel our faith is low. If we go back to the start of the story, the disciples see Jesus walking on the water towards them and they are afraid, they think he is a ghost. Jesus calls out to them and tells them to have courage, he tells them not to be afraid, he assures them it is him and they have nothing to fear. He is reassuring them and at the same time preparing them. The path that follows Christ is not an easy one and we will all need courage at times, but we must all remember that Jesus is always there to guide us. When Peter realises it is Jesus walking towards him he calls out to him:
“Lord if it is really you order me to come out on the water to you”.
How many times do we try to make bargains with God when we hit difficulties? How many times do we say ‘Lord, if you would just answer this prayer I promise I will be a model Christian for the rest of my days’. On that night in Galilee I think that Peter does this, he tests Jesus, somehow he still seems to need proof, even after all the miracles he has seen , even after all he has heard Jesus preach– even after he saw 5000 people fed with just five loaves and two fishes earlier that day. Even then he still says :
“Lord if it is really you order me to come out on the water to you.”
And Jesus answers “Come”. So Peter got out of the boat and started walking on the water to Jesus.
In response to his request, Jesus shows Peter His authority over the elements, not just because he wants Peter to know His power, but He also wants Peter to know his own weakness. Because it is Jesus who gives Peter the ability to walk on water and it is when Peter takes his eyes off Jesus that he starts to sink. Jesus is showing Peter that he can’t do anything in his own strength, he can only do the impossible in Gods strength, how does he do this? By keeping his eyes on Jesus and by standing on God’s word - in other words - faith. When Jesus rebukes him at the end of the passage he says: ‘What little faith you have’. When Jesus says ‘come’, He is asking Peter to trust him and have faith, to stand on His word. The same can be applied to us and to our walk with Jesus. The times when we are strong and fearless are the times when we have strong faith. It is when we lose focus and take our eyes off Jesus that life will get in the way of our view of him – when we can no longer see him we then start to see difficulties and problems, our faith starts to diminish we see our limitations, we start to doubt, we lose faith and it is at this point that everything becomes too much for us. When we turn our eyes from the cross we see nothing but problems, but lifting our eyes to Him offers all the solutions. Because it is only when we trust in God; when we relentlessly pursue Him and stand firmly on His word that we become fearless in faith. It is then that we can make the impossible possible – this is because we are working in His strength not our own.
Going back to the scripture, Jesus asks Peter to get out of the boat and walk towards him, to trust him and leave behind all that is safe. Obediently he does, and the impossible is made possible through Jesus’ authority and Peter’s faith. Once again this message is for us, when we are prepared to get out of the boat and follow Jesus we can also do what we would normally see as impossible. Paul said to me some time ago, faith is often spelt RISK. Peter was taking a risk when he stepped out of the boat, but he trusted Jesus and he stepped out into the unknown. When we trust Jesus he will furnish us with all we need to battle against the storms of life. It is our own weakness that makes us sink – not Gods. It is when we start to doubt and we start to lose faith that things go wrong…..then we stop standing on the word and then we try to find the answers ourselves and of course we can’t find them, we lose hope, we make the wrong decisions we lose direction and everything gets worse and worse. It is as this point, when we are at our weakest that the enemy moves in. This is the worst thing that can happen because he will make mischief, he will bind us and he will use our fears to turn out the light that God brings into our lives. He will make us frightened, he will take away our confidence, he will tell us lies so that we feel we that there is no way out and that our faith isn’t big enough to ask for help. Satan makes us more afraid – when we limit God, we think He can’t solve our problem and so we don’t ask because we don’t really expect an answer and we become afraid of what will happen if we don’t get the answer we want.
As Jesus shows Peter what is possible if we keep our eyes on Him, he also shows us that we too can do great things as long as we do it in His strength and not our own. It was when Peter allowed fear to dominate him and when he started to think of his own limitations rather than the Lords expectations, that he started to sink. Jesus was still there, right in front of him, it was Peter who looked away.
If we go back to the word again:
But when he noticed the strong wind, he was afraid and started to sink down in the water. Save me, Lord! He cried. At once Jesus reached out and grabbed hold of him and said, what little faith you have! Why did you doubt? They both got into the boat, and the wind died down.
Notice that Jesus doesn’t stop the storm immediately; he reaches out, holds Peter then carries him to the safety of the boat and it is then that the winds drop. This is another point - Jesus doesn’t stop the storm, he carries Peter through the storm. This is so important and so crucial in our walk with Jesus. Because following Jesus doesn’t mean that there won’t be storms in life, there will, the rain falls on the just and the unjust alike, in Matthew 5:45 it says:
He causes his sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous.
Loving Jesus and being a Christian does not exclude us from hardship. We won’t live a charmed life free of problems and pain. But- and this is the important bit, if we have faith and we stand on the word and if we keep your eyes fixed on Jesus, He will carry us through the storm. Doesn’t it say in the scripture that He will take our burdens and carry them, doesn’t He tells us not to be afraid. In Matthew 11 verse 28 he says:
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
It is when we cry out to God and when we feel that we can no longer go on that we become closest to Him. Peter cries out :Save me, Lord! And At once Jesus reached out and grabbed hold of him.
It is when we cry out to God that He holds us tightly and He comforts us, and it is during these times that we are at our most intimate with Him. It is through these times that we become stronger in our faith and closer to God. The storm dies down because of the intimacy that Peter shares with Christ as he carries him through the storm. The storm dies down because faith is restored and strengthened. Christ is our saviour – He will save us - when we call out to Him He will stretch out his arms to us lift us, hold us and carry us. Even on the stormiest of days he is always there and he is always ready to help us through the storm. Two weeks ago I had a routine mammogram and a week later I was called back, they had found a lump. I was frightened , I feared the worst, but I decided to stand on the word of God because I believe with all my heart and soul that God will turn all things for good for those who love him. My prayer was simple – that whatever the result was of the next set of tests, I was determined that my actions would be a testimony to my faith and that everything would be to Gods glory. The Lord drew me near and sent his angels to hold me up in prayer, at the service at Buxton rock on Sunday he gave Paul words to comfort me and the songs we sang in worship gave me strength. On the way to the hospital on Monday I put UCB on my iphone, something I had never done before, the words of scripture rang out....Matthew 11... Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.
the words I have just read to you. He was with me and I was not afraid. After numerous tests that day they couldn’t find the lump – I got the all clear.
The words in the song that I played earlier remind me of how I felt during those 4 days of waiting for the tests, the song tells us to praise God during these dark times:
And I'll praise you in this storm ,and I will lift my hands for You are who You are ,no matter where I am
I know that Praising God in the storm is so hard when everything seems so dark, sometimes it’s the last thing we want to do or even think of doing. But look at the bible, look at how often do we hear the psalmist praising God in the storms of his life, how often do we hear him crying out in desperation followed by an outpouring of love and praise and gratitude? It is at this point that God lifts him and restores him, and God will do exactly the same for us, He will lift us, just like Jesus did when Peter cried out to him that night, He loves us just as much as He loved his closest friend Peter. It is at this moment when we are on our knees in desperation and we cry to our lord and saviour that He will come, He will lift us and He will carry us to safety.
Finally, I also feel that this scripture is commissioning us as followers of Jesus. Jesus invites Peter to step out in faith, to step out of the boat and follow him. He commands him to come, to do the impossible. After the resurrection He commissions his disciples to step out in faith, to stand on the word and to stand in His strength – and through the Holy Spirit teach the word, heal the sick and bring people to know God. He commissions us to do the same - it’s a frightening thought, but it is possible - because we can do all things through Christ. It’s all right here in the bible. The bible will always tells us exactly what we should do in these situations. It’s so simple, but for some reason, when we are in the darkness we cant see any alternatives and nothing seems possible and more often than not we are too afraid to ask God for help. Our lack of faith limits us and this causes us to limit God. This is when we lose our way. It was Peter who took his eyes off Jesus, not the other way round. He was the one who stopped trusting Jesus and believing that the storms would over power him. But what did Jesus do? He lifted him, carried him through the storm and gently put him on safe ground. And he will do the same for you and me. In the darkest times he is waiting to bring us light....he is waiting, all we have to do is cry out and he will be there and he will carry us to a safe place. He will bring us light so that we may see.

:: Calling ::

2011-06-07T09:14:00.000-07:00

I recently applied to Luther King House to study to be a Lay Preacher. As part of my application I had to write an essay which explained my calling. A daunting task....why? although I mark essays all the time at work...I haven't written one for 21 years....

what did I write?

Read on......

The short answer as to why I wish to attend this course is because my Lord has called me to serve Him. At first it was a still small voice, which became louder and louder, quickly followed by a strong desire burning inside me to share God’s word, to encourage and feed others and to lift and direct them on their journey with Jesus.

The long answer takes me back to 2010 – a very difficult year for me. However, through the pain and suffering, a prayer which I had said each and every day, and continue to say, was answered. This prayer was that I should become the woman that the Lord intended me to be, to do what the Lord intended me to do, to serve in the way the Lord wanted me to serve Him.
First though, I had to be stripped of everything that at that time I felt defined me and that provided my self-worth. I had been a man-pleaser and not a God-pleaser. As a result, I was left on my knees. This was a life-changing experience. I prayed through it and I was obedient and consequently God turned around every hurt, He strengthened me, He lifted me, He restored me and blessed me beyond my wildest dreams. God used the pain to transform me, He used the experience to turn my life around and I have never looked back.

During the summer of 2010, I spent most of my time with God. Reading the word and Christian books and of course praying, then praying and then praying a little more. I did not sleep well, so when I awoke I prayed and saying the following scripture over and over again was of great comfort:
I will never fail you.
I will never forsake you.
That is why we say with confidence,
“The Lord is my helper; so I will not be afraid.
What can mere mortals do to me?”
(Hebrews 13 v5)

On one occasion, in a hotel room in Germany, I awoke at 4am and could not get back to sleep. So I began to pray. As I was praying I heard a still small voice. God wanted me to make space in my head for Him, to be creative, to be fulfilled and to serve Him. That was the first time I heard His voice. I was a little confused as to how I could make this space, but I held on to this word. I continued in prayer over the following days, but it was not until I returned home that it became clear what I had to do. The space the Lord wanted was currently inhabited by my work, an all-consuming pressure and weight, which hung over me, constantly pushing and pushing me further and further down. It was a heavy burden which enslaved me and bound me. It became obvious what had to go, so I made an incredibly difficult decision. I decided to relinquish my responsibility as Head of Department in the largest Secondary school in Leeds –a school I had worked at for 20 years and a job I had done for 10 years, a job that had defined me, a job that had nearly destroyed me. I was gripped by fear and I felt it was impossible. I would be losing so much: power, status and of course money. Financially my family would struggle. However, I pressed on in prayer and God told me these were worldly things and that He would provide. After discussing this with my husband, we decided to go ahead. We would change our lifestyle and would get rid of a car. Yet, I still did not know what God wanted to do with this space. When we returned home, we received a phone- call: at three days’ notice we were asked to organise and lead a service at our Church, something we had never done before. The Bible passage on which we were asked to base the service was Hebrews 13 v 6.

The day before I returned to work, I clearly remember lying on my bed, paralysed by fear. I opened my Bible and read this passage:
If you need wisdom – if you want to know what God wants you to do – ask him, and he will gladly tell you. He will not resent you asking. But when you ask him, be sure that you really expect him to answer.
James 1 v1

The still small voice had answered and I was astounded by the response. God wanted me to preach His word to his lambs. The words of the hymn ‘Here I am, Lord’ came to mind. I asked God to confirm that I had heard him correctly. What followed was a further series of events over the next few weeks which could not have made it clearer that God had plans for me. He wanted me to be a lay preacher and to serve Him in that way.

So, when I returned to work and much to the amazement of my colleagues and the senior team, I immediately relinquished my responsibility as Head of Department. Once I had done this I was free, the weight was lifted and I have never looked back. My decision and the way God has changed me and helped me to conduct myself has been a constant testimony of my faith to my colleagues. One lady asked recently,’ Helen, you are like a different woman, you look ten years younger, what’s your secret?’ I answered, ‘the Holy Spirit.’

I sometimes stop and think: ‘Is this all happening? Does God really want to use me? Can I do this?’ This does not last long and someone or something always happens to encourage me.
As we have not had a Minister for nearly three years now, opportunities have arisen for me to preach and take services at my home church. In order to prepare, I pray and wait and then He gives me the theme, the passages in the Bible and then finally the words, usually very fast and furious, usually at four in the morning. Nothing is from me – it is all from Him and it is all about Him. I think my profile on my blog best explains why I want to attend this course:
Last summer my life changed: it changed, because in the darkness I heard a small still voice. It got louder and louder ... I saw a light and I followed and now I feel I like a starving woman in front of a mighty feast, as I prepare to train to be a Lay Preacher... Do I know where I am going? Do I know where this will take me? No! Am I afraid? No! ... In the words of the hymn... "Here I am Lord, Is it I Lord? I have heard You calling in the night. I will go Lord, if You lead me. I will hold Your people in my heart." Join me on my journey as I follow the light and continue to listen to the still small voice....

So my prayer is to serve and to follow. I have no idea what the Lord has in store for me or what he has planned for me, but I do know that He wants me to preach and I do know He wants me to attend this course. I know I am no longer afraid and I know that I am being changed dramatically and I know I am excited and hungry for more. I feel like I am an empty vessel and I am waiting to be filled. I hope that you will give me the opportunity to attend this course and to satisfy my hunger and fill me with the word, so that I can share God’s love with others through Ministry in the Church.

::Mary Magdalene - forever faithful to her Lord ::

2011-04-29T10:41:00.000-07:00

I would like you to imagine that it’s a very hot day, hot and dusty, the midday sun is beating down on your back, the streets are busy, packed with people on all sides of you. You feel uncomfortable, you can hardly move, your mouth is dry, the walls are coming in on you, you are afraid. The heat is becoming unbearable and the crowds around you are making it worse because you can’t move. The temperature is high as is the mood of the crowd, they are pushing, they are excited, they are angry, they are spoiling for a fight. There is shouting, swearing and jostling - you are afraid of falling, you are afraid of being hurt, you are afraid of being found out. You allow yourself to be pulled along down the narrow streets and alleyways. Soldiers with whips and swords are standing on guard, lining the market place, waiting for trouble, ready to kill, wanting to shed blood. But the one you love the most is just in your sight and your love for him is stronger than your fear, your love for Him gives you the strength and the courage to press on. In the midday heat you climb the steep hill-side; your heart is beating because of the heat, because of your exertion, because of your fear. But your determination to be with the one you love during His final moments is stronger. No matter what you see, no matter what they do to Him, no matter how much it hurts to watch, your love for Him is greater; your loyalty to Him is greater your desire to serve Him until the very end is so much greater.

How many of us would be so fearless, so resolute, so constant? Remember Jesus’ answer to the question, ‘how do I inherit eternal life’, which was: 'Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind' Mary Magdalene lived this scripture, and no more than in this moment when she followed Jesus to the cross with the other women - she was a remarkable woman. A woman of great courage, of great faith and of great gratitude. Her actions, her constancy and her determination are an example to us all and teach us so much about how we should live our lives as followers of Jesus.

Mary Magdalene is to me, one of the most interesting and inspiring people that followed Jesus. She was the leader of a group of women disciples who were present at the cross, when the male disciples had fled in fear and gone under-ground. During a recent Tenebrae service as I was praying and listening to the gospel I thought about how lonely Jesus must have felt when all the people he trusted and loved had let him down. Judas had betrayed him, the disciples slept when he asked them to pray with him and Peter, his closest and most beloved, denied him three times. What was worse was that he knew that they would let him down. I thought about how much it hurts when your friends let you down and I thought of how much this must have hurt our Lord, it made me feel so sad. Then I remembered Mary, she didn’t let him down - she was there supporting him in his final terrifying moments. She witnessed the most horrific events on Calvary. It must have torn her apart, she must have been petrified, grief stricken - but she stayed, she stayed because she loved Jesus, she couldn’t bear to see him die alone – no matter what the cost may have been to her own life, he was more important to her – she couldn’t bear to let him down. Mary was a devoted follower of Jesus, She was there at the end and she was there at the beginning. The beginning that would transform the World.

What a great honor God bestowed upon Mary in permitting her to be the first to witness His resurrection! The gospel of John describes Mary going to the tomb at first light that first Easter morning, how she saw that the stone had been rolled away and that the cave was empty, and how this made her weep. Mary rushes to find Peter and John to tell them, they return to the tomb with Mary then they return to their own homes.

But Mary stayed, she is alone, she is heartbroken she is probably even afraid, then someone asks her why she's crying. She says, 'they have taken my lord's body and I do not know where it is'. The figure says her name. And then she sees Jesus. She is overwhelmed with joy. He tells her that she must go to the others and tell them that he has risen from the dead. What an amazing moment. Jesus stands before her and in this one moment, Mary's experience changed the future of Christianity – she is the first one to proclaim that Jesus didn't die – he was raised from the dead. It is Mary who first declares this wonderful news. It is Mary who Jesus commissioned to be the first messenger of His resurrection. It was Mary who was given the job of spreading the good news. What an honor to be the first to herald the resurrection! This was her reward and what a reward it was.

Yet this remarkable woman has not been remembered for her faith or for her courage or her constancy. The Mary Magdalene that most people bring to mind is quite a different woman. In art, she's often depicted as semi-naked, or an outcast. In fact most people know her best as a sinner and a prostitute. In Ireland Laundries were opened in her name, where the inmates were called ‘Maggies’ and endured terrible physical and mental abuse and working conditions in order to serve their penance. They were incarcerated in these prisons for also being outcasts in society. Mary has even been linked to Jesus romantically with suggestions that they were married. However, there is no evidence for any of this in the gospels.

I believe that there is much that we can learn from the life of Mary Magdalene. As I have researched her, I believe that through her life we not only learn what Christ can do for us, but what we can do for Him. When Jesus healed her, His great love and compassion toward her completely changed her life and led Mary to become a faithful, sacrificial follower of Jesus. So grateful was Mary for her deliverance, that she practiced her faith by following Jesus and ministering to Him and his disciples. Her gratitude and love manifested itself in her devotion to Christ right till the very end of his life. The reward for her faithfulness was to be the first person to herald the good news.

Mary Magdalene owed much, gave much, loved much and served much. She is a wonderful example of a woman whose life was poured out in response to God’s extravagant grace. Mary Magdalene loved Jesus deeply - though Mary Magdalene has been often misunderstood, she can teach us how to love Jesus deeply.

So what can we learn from Mary Magdalene’s devotion to Jesus?First, we can learn determination, diligence and patience. She was the first one to the tomb that first Easter morning. When Mary arrived at Jesus’ tomb, she was stunned. The huge rock, which was supposed to seal the tomb, was gone. Immediately, she went to go get help, thinking that the body had been stolen. After the disciples came and saw it for themselves, they went back home. Only Mary Magdalene remained at the tomb, she would not give up she was determined, she was persistent, she remained constant, she waited and she was rewarded. Sometimes we give up on God too quickly. I know I do. I pray and I pray and I ask God to help me , and then when I don’t hear an answer immediately I think that God has ignored my prayer, I think my prayers are not strong enough they are not good enough or that I don’t deserve my prayers to be answered because I am not good enough.

Or sometimes I when I have asked God to intervene in a situation and it doesn’t happen right away when I want things to happen, I decide to take the matter into my own hands and I try to solve the problem myself, usually with disastrous results. That’s because I have been impatient, I haven’t trusted I haven’t waited on the Lord for his perfect timing. I should have kept praying, strengthened my faith and trusted God. I always remember a friend sharing with me many years ago, she said that sometimes God says yes to our prayers, sometimes the answer may be no and sometimes he wants us to wait. Mary Magdalene waited on the Lord. She waited and she didn’t let anything deter her from what she was seeking. She wanted to see Jesus even though it looked impossible, even though she didn’t get an immediate answer, even when her friends gave up and went home - she stayed, Mary had faith and she trusted God- she waited on the Lord. In his timing he rewarded her, he came to her he blessed her. He will do the same for us too.

We can also learn about enthusiasm and passion from Mary Magdalene. Once she realised that that she was speaking to Jesus and not a gardener, once Jesus had told her to go share the news of his resurrection, nothing could stop her from telling others. Mary was so excited she could not keep her enthusiasm, or her passion or the Good news to herself. She was bursting at the seams to share the best news she had ever heard. Her Christian witness continues to direct people to Jesus today. Mary's message that Jesus is alive, is for us all, for us all to search for, to understand and experience and above all else share with others.
How many times have you been overflowing with enthusiasm to share some good news? How often do you want to ring or text your nearest and dearest and tell them about something wonderful that has happened to you – you just have to share it, it burns inside you – the joy that it brought you has to be shared. My best friend and I often text each other when we have found a bargain, or something we have been looking for, for a long time or when God has blessed us – we can’t wait to share the good news with each other. That’s the kind of enthusiasm that Mary Magdalene had about Jesus’ resurrection. Seeing Jesus, risen from the dead, was the best thing that ever happened to her she couldn’t keep this news to herself she had to share it, she had to celebrate, just like the woman in the gospel that found her silver coin.

So why is it that we can so easily share news of a family event or a trip or good book, but we are often afraid or nervous about sharing the best news of all - the news of Jesus’ resurrection? What matters more - a film with a good plot or Jesus overcoming death once and for all? What matters more – a really good day out at the seaside or the Son of God coming back to life? We have witnessed the same event that Mary Magdalene did. We know that Jesus was raised from the dead. We know we are freed because he broke the bonds of death once and for all. I text my best friend and tell her about Gods blessings because she is a believer, would I be as ready to send the same text to one of my friends who doesn’t follow Jesus? I know its hard, I know its frightening, but we can put a spin on the day at the seaside or the bargain at the sales – we can share this news and we can add – ‘what a blessing’ to our sentence. We can start to sow the seeds of Gods blessings in the hearts of those who don’t yet believe. We can share good news, we can share prayers answered and we can encourage others – we just need to be brave, we just need to ask Jesus to come into our lives to make us burn with passion – my best friend often reminds me – ‘are you are God pleaser or a man pleaser Helen?’ It stops me short and makes me think – I know who I want to please, I know who I want to thank, I know who I want to praise and it isn’t any man. She also reminds me that we are asked to be a fool for Jesus. The disciples may have thought Mary a fool for waiting by the tomb for Jesus. But she didn’t care, her faith in him was stronger and she waited – she was a fool for Jesus, sitting by an empty tomb, waiting.

I have decided to be a fool for Jesus this week, I am going to tell someone about the good news, I am going to ask God to give me an opportunity to share my faith with someone else. I want to be a God pleaser will you join me? Will you be a fool for Jesus?

::What is worship? ::

2011-03-13T00:05:00.000-08:00

"The heart of God loves a persevering worshipper, who though overwhelmed by many troubles, is overwhelmed even more by the beauty of God"
Matt Redman

"You are worthy, our Lord and God, to receive glory and honour and power, for You created all things, and by Your Will they were created and have their being".
Rev 4: 11 NIV

What is Worship?

Worship is an act of religious devotion, usually directed to one or more deities. The word is derived from the Old English worthscipe, meaning worthiness or worth-ship — to give, at its simplest, worth to something, for example, Christian worship.

An act of worship may be performed individually, in an informal or formal group, or by a designated leader. Religious worship happens in a wide variety of locations: in purpose-built places of worship, at home or in the open. Many religious traditions place an emphasis upon regular worship at frequent intervals, often daily or weekly. Expressions of worship vary but typically include one or more of the following:
Prayer, meditation, ritual, scripture, sacraments, sacrifice, sermons, chanting, music or devotional song, dance, religious holidays, festivals, pilgrimage, dining, fasting, temples or shrines, idols, or simply private individual acts of devotion.

Wikipedia definition of worship

What is worship? This was the opening question for our consideration at my first session of training as a Lay Preacher.

The group made the following suggestions in answer to the question:

Telling God we love him
Giving Glory to God
Thanking God for all he has created
Adoration
Praise

We spent the whole evening discussing this question... covering worship as a discipline, an experience with God and that it can be anything that gives glory to God.....we ran out of time.

I found that the more we discussed this, the harder it was to define and at the end of the session my little group couldn't come up with a definitive. As a whole group we all came up with similar ingredients in our recipe to define worship, but after all was said and done, I felt that worship is a very personal thing. It is an experience that we as individuals can only share with God.

I challenge you to think about this question as well and would love to hear your thoughts. I personally find it a very difficult question and the more I consider it and pray about it the harder it becomes to put into words.

When I got home from my course, I wanted to pursue this question further. Is not the understanding and unravelling of this question key to leading exciting worship which brings our congregations closer to God?

In pursuit of a better understanding I turned to the Internet. As a visual person I first put 'worship' into google image and the recurring theme was of images of hands raised in praise. I almost always feel compelled to lift my hands in praise during worship songs. I don't know why, it's an automatic response when I feel overwhelmed by my feelings for God. But do we have to raise our hands to worship? The answer is no, because once again worship is a very personal thing between the worshipper and God. Once again the answer is individual and personal. The act of worship is surely an internal experience. Sometimes one which is an automatic response to a feeling or emotion.

But worship can also be a discipline, an action in dark times in order to get closer to God, to understand, to ask for answers, to beg to be lifted. The psalms are an example of this and much of the psalmists' words are laments which are then followed by praise and worship. I remember as as young Christian my friend suggested that when life was hard and I couldn't see the light, the key to turning the situation around was to praise and worship God. It works.

A turning point in my walk was last Easter. I don't think things could have felt any worse. I was walking through the darkest of valleys. A friend encouraged me and said: 'whatever you do, do it for the glorification of God, pray that whatever happens, it is for the glorification of God'. That encouragement has changed my life. With God's help I did this and this led me to where I am now, making space in my life for God and working to further his kingdom.

I then typed the question 'What is worship' into google I found this website

http://www.living-waters.co.uk/ministries/worship.php

I felt their explanation was much closer to my understanding andthey had been able to express in words what I was starting to formulate.

"We have clearly felt God's call to worship above all else and are still on a journey towards a deeper understanding of this.
We are made to worship. When the presence of God comes to us who await His appearing, our hearts respond with worship and adoration. As we worship, we move in a realm of faith that pleases God. Ministering pure worship reaches the heart of God. We need to come also to present ourselves as an offering, seeking only that He would be blessed. Worship is expressed in many ways, but is essentially an attitude of heart.

"Teach me Your Ways, O Lord, that I may live according to Your Truth! Grant me purity of heart, so that I may honour You. With all my heart I will praise You, O Lord my God. I will give glory to Your Name forever....."
Psalm 86: 11 and 12, NLT

But it was this picture on their website which encapsulated my understanding and experience...

Worship interpreted and painted by Caroline Jordan

In conclusion, I would like to suggest that every thing we do in life can be done for the Glorification of God and can be an act of worship. I have just spent three years writing, preparing, directing and producing a school production. I have put my heart and soul into this project. I would argue that the whole project from start to finish has been an act of worship - a testimony to my walk with Jesus and as the final product looms next week, it will be to me for the glory of my God.

I have experienced amazing worship with other Christians, but I have also experienced amazing worship alone on a beach in Skye. Worship is a very complex and personal thing. I certainly find it hard to put into words. I also feel that as we grow in our Christian walk, our acts of worship change, deepen and develop. I know that I will return to this question again and again, because it is my calling to gather people to worship and to lead them to a deeper and more personal relationship with God. One thing I am certain of, as I return to this question, during my two years of training as a Lay Preacher, the answer will almost certainly always be a different one......

:: All you need is Love ::

2011-02-19T11:48:00.001-08:00

If you were to ask any of my students about me, I would put money on it that they would tell you about my 'boiled sweets of love'. My boiled sweets are famous throughout the school community- a reward for good work, for trying hard or for good behaviour. I also have an equally famous 'circle of love' - which is the way we start and end every lesson and another favourite is my oh so frequent request for my little darlings to answer questions or work together in a 'loving manner' - ( the students like to join in on the word 'Manner'). Everywhere in my Drama studio there are hearts and images of love. I even have a heart stamp which says 'I love their work'.

They all think I am mad, their parents think I am quite mad, my colleagues think I am mad - perhaps you do too - but am I?

Isn't love fundamental to the Christian faith? Isn't loving one another what we as Christians have been called to do? In Luke 10:27, Jesus tells us to “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind’ and, ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ Later in Hebrews 13 he tells us 'to love each other with true Christian love'. In fact Love is mentioned over and over and over again in the Bible.

It is because of this that I feel that loving one another is crucial to our faith and our living testimonies to others. By loving one another we become sensitive to each others needs and this is how we can truly support our brothers and sisters in times of darkness. Life can be tough, we can all face journeys through the valleys and it is through genuine love for one another that we can hold each other up when we become tired or too weak to pray for our selves. It is then that we can hold their hands and walk with them towards the light. I just love the idea of holding people up in prayer and what a blessing it is when we see they have physically been lifted by God.

I try to constantly remind my students that love is important, that we should treat one another with respect, we shouldn't fall out or be unkind to one another. I know this is hard for them, it's hard for anyone, don't we all have people in our lives who we feel are unlovable? Perhaps they have hurt us or someone we care about or somehow they just rub us up the wrong way. But we were called to love the unlovable. Since I became a Christian I have found that turning these relationships around brings the greatest of joys and acts as the greatest of examples to others. When someone has hurt you, forgiving them, and loving them doesn't mean they have won, it means you are free. Loving one another sets you free. Think of how heavy and bound you feel when you constantly go over and over what someone has done to hurt you. Believe me I know, when someone hurts me I can be like a scratched record. But I have seen the blessings of forgiving, of loving, of moving forward and setting myself free.

So I would like to encourage you this week to ask God who you need to forgive, who the unlovable is in your life at the moment. Ask for Him to help you, give the situation and the relationship to Him to heal and I promise you the results will be amazing. You will have no idea how you will be blessed by doing this. It's very simple but its very powerful, in the words of Lennon & McCartney - 'All you need is love!'

Thoughts and the basis of my first sermon on March 6th.

A still small voice.......

2011-02-02T10:26:00.000-08:00

I prayed tonight and I listened. I listened carefully. I heard a small still voice.I have heard it before. It was telling me to write:to lay down in words the journey that I am about to take. I don't know why. I am not an extraordinary person. I am in fact quite commonplace. I am not eloquent or wise, but I am obedient. So here are my words, my feelings and my thoughts, my hopes and dreams, my fears and anxieties. The ups and the downs, the mountains and valleys, on my walk with my Lord.

I don't know where my journey will take me, but I do know I have a lot of love to give and I know my heart overflows with love when I think of Jesus. I know that the decision to relinquish my responsibilities at work last September and to take a large pay cut in order to make space for God, has blessed me and brought me a peace which I cannot put into words. I know God is changing me. I know I am not afraid.

I think that God wants to use me and I know I want to serve Him I know I want to preach his word. This is an exciting adventure and I know it is going to be difficult at times. I don't know if I am ready, but I do know I am here and I am waiting for that still small voice once again....